I am an immigrant to USA who has settled here for the last thirty years. I have raised my family here. We were not the very strict family, but followed Islam in every way and raised our children, who were also good in understanding and following the religion. Since we were in a small town, the exposure to other good Muslim families was limited. Now that we have a larger Muslim group and have an Islamic Center, things are different. They have studied Islam and the Qur’an and completely understood that this is the right way.
But during this time the children have grown up and have left for colleges, out of town. It is there that we saw problems, and now it seems that the children have abandoned the religion and become openly agnostics. We are very much devastated by it and after trying hard through family, through talks, meetings with the imam, and with Islamic scholars, all attempts have failed. Right now all we have is prayers and hope for the mercy of Allah, that He shall guide these kids back. We have also informed them that the non-Muslim children are not part of the family and will be out of touch and on their own, in addition to disinherit them as well.
Now, we are looking for any help that will provide some guidance for us to redirect these unfortunate kids back to the religion and save them from the fire of Hell.
I am not sure, if this is what is written in the fate, or the effect of this society, pressures from the peers, or what, it may be that we kept them in strict control, and when they got out of the house, it happened. But whatever may be the reason, now we are faced with this situation, and seek help from your esteem resources.
Answer
I can understand your concern on the issue. It is indeed very unfortunate that your children have practically left the religion they follow and have forgotten the tradition they belong to. At the same time it is very encouraging that you have grasped the gravity of the matter and are concerned with the present state of affairs. It is indeed lack of objective education and aggressive indoctrination that leaves the people in doubt regarding what they are taught to believe in. Qur’an, the last word of God does not adopt this approach. All the Prophets and Messengers of God try to make people understand the reality of the religious teachings and have them understand first what is required of them to believe and practice in life.
I am sure something must have caused the children turn into kind of agnostics. It would be better to know the reasons they must have in their minds for the change. Though I can understand you must have tried to enter into a healthy dialogue with them in this regard but I would request please to try to start discussing the problem with them afresh. We should not try to press others on the issue rather try to forward convincing arguments and invite them to think over them. Though no parent lack sincerity towards the fate of their children but they must also be prudent. If we are able to understand the root of the problem and help them understand the true message of Islam which of course is not superficial rather is well argued and endorsed by reason and intellect then they would become more firm in their beliefs and it is hoped they will not be affected by most detrimental atmosphere and most unhealthy environment. The winds of evil cannot put out the strong flame of light powered by strong arguments. If we try to logically convince our children and explain to them wisdom behind and arguments which establish the belief we have then it would not be possible for any bad company and evil forces to persuade the young ones to fall in evil.
Therefore I would recommend to restart the dialogue with them afresh and concentrate only on logic and reasoning and on highlighting wisdom behind the teachings of Islam and avoid indoctrination. You could share with us and other friends of yours the problem they have and the reason they give. Healthy dialogue and prayer from you will in SHAAllah help. It would not be prudent to warn them that they would not be entitled to any inheritance and any other loss that you may cause them in future. It is only the steps towards them that will attract them to you and your religion and not the ones that you take in retreat. Another important thing that I want you to appreciate is that we cannot say that Islam does not render them entitled to inheritance. It is in fact those of the children regarding whom we are certain that they are knowingly denying the truth and have resolved upon rejecting the truth. We have no means to know in what is in their hearts and they may have genuine reasons and may have questions which need to be answered. Therefore they are not necessarily illegible to receive inheritance. (for further discussion on the issue please refer to the topic: Prohibition of Inheritance from non-Muslim Parents on the page: . Directives Specific to the Age of the last Rasul)
Finally I would say that strengthen every effort of yours with prayer. A prayer can change every impossible act into possible and every inconceivable into a reality materialized before our very eyes.
